I Have Nothing
by Asifweneversaidgoodbye
Summary: CrissColfer drabble; Darren is in the auditorium listening to Kurt singing 'I have nothing'. Suddenly he understands the lyrics a bit too well.


**AN; Hi guys. I just heard I have nothing.**

**Asdfghgfdfg. Goddamnit. Chris' voice always make me feel a lot of things, but this love song directed to Blaine is going to be the death of me! I'm sure! I just really needed to write this after listening to it..**

**Disclaimer Do not own the rights of Whitney Houston's songs, Darren or Chris. Or Brad for that matter.**

**Enjoy!**

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I walked towards the auditorium in my Blaine outfit, curious about what song Chris, or Kurt, was going to sing for me. Ryan and Chris had kept it a secret, telling me I'd find out at the moment Kurt would perform it to me, because in that way they'd get the most natural reaction out of me.

To say I was a bit nervous about it, wouldn't be a lie. Chris' voice always did things to me. Chris' emotional face always made my heart shatter in a thousand pieces. And Chris' singing emotional songs about his boyfriend who actually sang him a song about wanting to break up with him, would probably make me have a mental break down.

I reached the auditorium and saw the spot I was supposed to stand, according to Brad who'd put a white 'x' on the ground. Walking over I leaned over and waited with berated breath.

Nothing could have prepared me for what was about to happen.

Chris walked on stage, dressed as Kurt, walking as Kurt, eyes filled with emotions I only had ever seen in Kurt's eyes and made me slip into Blaine-mood pretty easily. Working with Chris Colfer made you grow as an actor. Simple as that.

"Blaine?" Chris' voice drifted through the auditorium, slightly broken and hopeless.

God his voice.

"I'm here," I said back in a broken voice as well, which had nothing to do with the emotions I felt as Blaine.

"I'm really- You-." Chris ended his sentences with a frustrated groan. "Just listen, okay?"

I nodded even though he couldn't really see me in this dark spot.

The piano floated through the air and made the hairs on my arms stand up.

_Share my life_  
_Take me for what I am_  
_Cause I'll never change_  
_All my colors for you_  
_Take my love_  
_I'll never ask for too much_  
_Just all that you are_  
_And everything that you do_

Fucking hell. Why did I get a solo every goddamn week, when Ryan actually had Chris? Chris who could sing with so much emotion, so much heartbreak and with this angelic voice that made my heart beat ten times faster when it sounded through the air.

_I don't really need to look_  
_Very much further_  
_I don't wanna have to go_  
_Where you don't follow_  
_I won't hold it back again_  
_This passion inside_  
_Can't run from myself_  
_There's nowhere to hide_

Oh god, his voice was even more beautiful now. His strong voice made goosebumps arise all over my skin and I could only gaze at Chris, in no way able to push down all the emotions I felt coursing through me right now.

_Don't make me close one more door_  
_I don't wanna hurt anymore_  
_Stay in my arms if you dare_  
_Must I imagine you there?_  
_Don't walk away from me_  
_I Have Nothing_  
_Nothing_  
_Nothing if I don't have you_

I wanted to be in his arms. More than anything. I wanted to hold him, tell him he was going to be okay. He was going to be loved. I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes, streaming down my cheeks in silent lines.

_You see through_  
_Right to the heart of me_  
_You break down my walls_  
_With the strength of your love_  
_I never knew_  
_Love like I've known it with you_  
_Will our memories survive?_  
_One I can hold on to?_

I thought of all the times I spend time with Chris. Hanging on his couch, laughing on set, crying in his arms, cuddling in bed, staring at him from across the room, thinking about him when I was lying in bed alone.

The sudden realization hit me like a ton of bricks.

I was in love with Chris.

I didn't really need to look any further.

I didn't want Glee to end, because it would mean the ending of us as well.

I didn't want to lose him.

I had nothing without him.

I wanted him with me forever.

Looking at how Chris was staring at me with hopeful, desperate, painful eyes, made me clench my hands in fists around the rail. How could I have missed this all the time? How was I supposed to act now?

I hoped my eyes didn't show the breakdown I was having, feeling so much at once for the man in front of me who was singing his heart out for the boy he loved as well. Even though it was in character.

Chris finished his lines, ending with a heartbreaking sob while he crumbled down to the ground, shielding his face with his hands, afraid Blaine would turn him down.

"_Kurt_." His name escaped my lips in a broken whisper, hands already reaching out towards him before the sudden '_Cut_!' sounded through the air.

"Perfect guys. Just perfect!" Brad said from the back of the auditorium, although I couldn't care less at the moment. "Take twenty, I'll be back then, we'll shoot it again for some different angles."

A filled silence filled the auditorium and I couldn't help but stare at Chris who changed from laying on the floor to sitting with his face resting on his knees, not really looking at me.

Trying to order my feet out of the frozen state they were in, I finally managed to let go of the rail and to walk towards Chris.

When I stood next to him, he looked up, eyes still filled with tears although a watery smile made its way to his lips.

"What did you think?" he asked in a hoarse voice.

Apparently the song took a lot out of Chris as well.

"You-I… You were-" I shook my head, trying to order my thoughts before I'd declare all my love for him.

"Wow. You're speechless! It must have been at least a bit good then," Chris said in a joking matter, although his eyes still looked sad.

I sank down next to him on the floor, reaching my hand out to cup his cheek.

A surprised gasp sounded through the air, but he said nothing.

My eyes were staring at his intensely, somewhere hoping he could read it all in my eyes.

"You were perfect," I said, voice still filled with wonder and sadness.

Chris blushed and smiled hesitantly.

"Well, thank you. It took a lot out of me, but you can tell," Chris replied and shook his head slightly. "Were you crying as well? I thought I saw it, but it was a bit hard to really see you with these blinding lights."

My hand dropped from his cheek, when his eyes were looking at me with curiosity.

"I was, yes," I replied, which made him smile again.

"You're a very good Blaine, Dare."

Why was his voice filled with so much sadness and devastation?

"I'm afraid there wasn't a single fiber of me being Blaine just now."

Oh fuck, did I actually say that? Was I trying to scare the shit out of him?

His eyebrows frowned and his lips parted a little, just like he did in the original song scene. God, _why _did I remember every moment so well? Why did it took me _this _long to actually find out I was in love with him?

"There wasn't? Did you just cut onions then, or…?" Chris asked, trying to make a joke out of it, but I could hear him being nervous.

"No. It's just. God, Chris. You sounded so… so _hurt_ and goddamn _hopeful_ it took my breath away, gave me shivers and apparently made me _cry_. How do you even do that?"

Chris shrugged nonchalantly and avoided my eyes when he answered.

"Think of moments in real life where you felt the same I guess."

Cupping his cheek again I searched his eyes with mine.

"If someone you loved so much has ever letten you go, he's a freaking idiot and he should feel regret for the rest of his life."

The finality, protectiveness and devotion I could hear in my own voice startled me.

"He can't help it. He didn't know and isn't feeling the same. I don't blame him."

The speaking in the present time made my breath hitch. Could it be-?

"Did you tell him? I asked him, hearing the slight crack of hope in my voice.

Chris lowered his eyes.

"No. But I dropped enough hints. If someone isn't looking, doesn't want to look.. what are you supposed to do then?" Blue eyes looked up at mine, breaking me down once again.

"Some people can be pretty oblivious and stupid you know.." I started.

Deciding it was now or never I started speaking again.

"If I was that guy I would have been the most happy person on the world. I would have kissed you. Taken you home and never let you go."

A strained silence was my reply.

Then suddenly a warm hand clasped around the hand I still had against Chris' cheek.

"Would you?" he asked me in a soft whisper.

Adrenaline streamed through my veins, making me hyper aware of everything.

The way Chris' hand was gripping mine tightly. The way his eyes were looking at me with well hidden longing. The way his body was leaning towards mine in a inconspicuous way. The way his breath ghosted over my skin, making me wish for more.

"I would."

Stormy eyes filled with golden flecks were coming nearer and nearer and suddenly I understood what Chris was about to do.

Closing the gap between our lips I felt the press of dry warm lips against mine. Chris' lips. God, and if those weren't the _best _lips ever. My hand raised to his waist in a careful manner, grabbing it lightly to pull him more towards me. The angle in which we sat made our kiss a bit awkward, but _I was kissing Chris_. Suddenly Chris opened his lips and probed my lower lip with his tongue. Opening up immediately for him I could feel his tongue find mine, meeting each other in a curious matter. They slowly circled each other as if they were testing ground, even though it wasn't the first time they had met. But in some way it was.

Our kisses had never started out of love between the two of us.

Deepening our kiss, I ensured Chris could feel every emotion I was feeling at the moment. The way the kiss was returned made me believe Chris understood and knew.

The lack of air broke us apart, but before I could pull Chris in a hug, he was scrambling back and standing up.

Looking up at him I wondered what the hell happened? Did he regret it? Didn't he mean what I thought he'd meant? But… he kissed me back right? Chris was walking of set, and I couldn't help but yell his name, which made him turn around, eyes questioning.

The way he just stood there made my heart bounce out of my chest. It was now or never.

"Don't walk away from me."

Chris smiled, walking back towards me and putting his hands around my face.

"Never," he said and pecked me on the lips, eyes a muddy green now. "I just need to take a deep breath away from you if Brad wants me to be emotional Kurt again.

Kissing him back, longer than Chris did, I finally took a step back.

No, I had nothing without Chris, but I did have Chris. Right here. Right now.

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**AN: I hope I did it some justice.. And if you didn't hear it yet. GO LISTEN TO IT. sighs dreamily* **


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